


Sensible Precaution.

by thequidditchpitch_archivist



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Comedy, Drabble
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2007-07-20
Updated: 2007-07-20
Packaged: 2018-10-26 10:47:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 267
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10785273
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thequidditchpitch_archivist/pseuds/thequidditchpitch_archivist
Summary: First Times are always a little awkward.





	Sensible Precaution.

**Author's Note:**

> Note from Annie, the archivist: this story was originally archived at [The Quidditch Pitch](http://fanlore.org/wiki/The_Quidditch_Pitch), which went offline in 2015 when the hosting expired, at a time I was not able to renew it. I contacted Open Doors, hoping to preserve the archive using an old backup, and began importing these works as an Open Doors-approved project in April 2017. Open Doors e-mailed all authors about the move and posted announcements, but may not have reached everyone. If you are (or know) this creator, please contact us using the e-mail address on [The Quidditch Pitch collection profile](http://archiveofourown.org/collections/thequidditchpitch/profile).

  
Author's notes: With thanks to Harrysmom and Mint Tingle for inspiration.   


* * *

Sensible Precaution.

by alloy  

"It's really quiet simple Ronald, You take a condom like so, open it with a pair of scissors. Being very, very careful not to cut it."

Hermione reached for a nearby broom, extracting the condom from its wrapper she pinched the end and unrolled it onto the broom handle.

"See Ronald, you would place it on like that."

"No I won't."

"Yes you will Ronald. I've heard far to many stories about how contraception spells don't work on Weasleys to take a chance."

"That won't work either."

"Of course it will." 

Hermione ‘tutted’ in exasperation and growing frustration. "All you have to do is co-operate and then we can....." Ron was shaking his head. "It's not that bad Ron, honestly my Dad says..."

"You asked your Dad?

"Well of course Ron, Mum's really too much of a prude to be honest and Dad always...."

"Oh Merlin!" Ron held his face in his hands. "He knows! What I… I mean we… I mean.....HE KNOWS HERMIONE!"

"Of course he knows Ron. In fact he thought we had already."

Ron sighed deeply. "I really don't think..."

"Ronald! Don't think about my father, or my mother for that matter." Hermione’s foot tapped against the floor. "Just put on the bloody condom!"

"No!"

"No?"

"I will not put that on my broomstick, it'll bugger up its balance, and besides I think you read the instructions wrong."

"Broomstick? No Ron, I meant..."

"Wouldn't it make much more sense Hermione if I put it on my willy?"

Fin?


End file.
